Sibling “Hangers-on”
I am dealing with a situation that I am trying to be fair about. I am throwing my 5 year-old an ‘End of the Summer Jam”. We rented a moonbounce for the backyard, sno-cone machine and other amusements. We don’t celebrate birthdays so this is his opportunity to “party” with friends and eat ice cream/cake.
I invited around 16 kids who I know he has identified as his friends…including a few cousins. Now, I sent invitations addressed to the child from my son. I’ve had several phone calls/conversations about older and younger siblings not being invited. My aunt called to find out why I only put Cameron’s name on the invitation and not his older brother. I reminded her that Cameron is my son’s age and his brother is like 9. Of course he will come since they’ll travel a few hours for the party anyway. My sister was the only one who got the point. She is planning to hang out with my 9 year old nephew while the 6 year old comes to the party.
A few friends also asked the same thing. I reminded them that the invitation said mommies don’t have to stay…so if you want the 3 year old to come, you will have to stay. Also, I invited 17 and expect about 10. This was my “vision”. I don’t want toddlers being trampled on the moonbounce or big kids pushing my son and his PEERS around. The age range is 4-6.
Why are parents like that? Why should it be a package deal? Is it so hard to explain to your other kids that little Johnny may have friends independent of you? Am I being petty?
No you are not being petty! Some things never change. I dealt with the same thing when Ryan was a small child. With a family as large as mine, I always had people wanting to bring ALL their kids regardless of ages. I suggested the drop off lil’ Johnny and go somewhere with their other kids. Just do it your way and if others get po’d, who cares because it is just rude to bring uninvited guests to an invitation-issued affair.
Comment by Sharon — August 18, 2007 @ 3:10p
You’re definitely not being petty. I see this with a lot of my friends with small children. I’m not sure why people feel that their youngins can’t have their very own friends. It wouldn’t be abnormal if the older child got his or her own invitation to a party.
And you’re a better woman than me with a bunch of 4-6 year olds and a moonbounce.
Comment by Bella Noire — August 21, 2007 @ 7:04p
I don’t think you’re being petty, but you’re not being thoughtful for someone who has 2 children. why not let everyone come and have games and things for the small ones, and games for the bigger kids?
What you’re asking is not really fair. I have a 3 and 5 yr old, and if the 5 yr old was only invited, specifically leaving out my 3 yr old, I wouldn’t waste my time.
would you really not mind if only one of your children was invited? It seems kind of ridiculous. If they were teens it would be a differnt story, but we’re talking little kids.
Comment by anon — August 21, 2007 @ 9:19p